It Is October's Perpetual Agony

This weekend, Peter's grandniece & I went to a very special engagement party for
a dear friend of Peter's, whom I first met over ten years ago.
As Siobhan & I drove through Westchester, up into Connecticut, along the water's edge,
the beauty of nature called to us. I know, if Peter was alive,
we would have made this trip together.
Thank you Jen & Mike for inviting us to your engagement party.
I'm sure Peter would have wanted to be there.

I love the photos that Jen takes ... they are hauntingly enticing.

Check out Jen's Photo Gallery:


Suspended in Dusk

"Damn me Father, for I must sin..."
Four centuries of this damned immortality
Yet, I did not ask to be made. Why?
I will never again feel your sun upon my face
Or the comfort of a grave
I am not alive and I am not dead
This is Hell on earth
How can I possibly explain this eternal youth?
When I can do nothing, but sit by
As my loves grow old and wither
And with each of them, take a fragment of my heart
And prolong this endless winder
It is October's perpetual agony
It is the shadow realm
Father, please forgive him
For he knows not what to do
With every victim I pray for my own death
And as much as I love the night
I curse the moon's eerie glow
Tis bloodlust that drags me to forever
The toxic rays of dawn that condemn me to limbo
I am forced to dwell in grey Autumnal twilight
I am suspended in dusk
Father, please forgive him
For he knows not what to do
Father, please forgive him
For he knows not what to do

Love this vampire themed song ... Sorry, couldn't find it live !
 Live ... Pittsburgh ... Everything Dies


  1. I love Suspended in Dusk, very haunting and I love how Peter sings it. As usual the song is great but I dont like to think about what the lyrics meant to Peter. I remember Peter saying in an interview / or I read it, that he didnt like to do the songs off World Coming Down live. I could only imagine how hard it would be to do Everything Dies live...way too emotional for him. Unfortunately being one of Type O Negatives singles the band probably had to do it.
    Jen..love your photos,the one of the Gothic Haunted House is beautiful, wish I could live there. I think I might get scared in a place that big though. I wish you and Mike a very happy life.

  2. i love this song...the world is surely missing HIS beautiful soul...

  3. That was some really awesome photography. Jenn is very talented. I love "Suspended In Dusk." Kind of eerie since it's the last song I listened to this morning. I hope wherever Pete may be that he is getting to enjoy the autumn change of colors.

  4. I love the song Suspended in Dusk. It is so gothic and alluring. I have often wondered what was the inspiration for it. Maybe an Ann Rice book or the classic Dracula? Jen's photographs are very interesting. I get a kick out of the photos of the plush black cat/skull. The rest are all so haunting and lovely. She is very talented. Thank you for sharing. I live along the river in Westchester and every time Fall rolls around we think of Peter. This Fall and the last make us sad to know he is not outside here enjoying it and writing more great music. Instead we know he is in the hereafter enjoying an eternal walk in the woods with those he sang about in Everything Dies.----Miss you Peter---Jessica (Black Number 1)

  5. Nice pictures! Missing Peter as well. Peace, xCarrie

  6. As a collector of Type O Negative live shows I'm positive that Suspended In Dusk was never played live.

    Does anyone know if it was intended to go on Bloody Kisses at some point or was it strictly to be used as a B-Side from the sessions? I've always wondered that because its a good song, but its too long to fit on the album with all of the other songs on there.

    I tried to make a copy of Bloody Kisses for a car ride with Suspended In Dusk as the final track & it came out to a bit over 82 minutes. If you are wondering, yes I do own a store bought copy of the album that I've had since the 90s, but refuse to bring my CDs in my car for fear of scratching them or losing them.

  7. Wonderful pictures and wonderful song!! Peter will always be with you!...Thank you for sharing. :)

  8. Suspended in Dusk is one of the songs I listen to when I write. Granted, most of my novels feature vampires or beings who are functionally immortal. Every time I hear that song I get cold shivers imagining myself into the mind of someone who has forever--yet nothing.

  9. This pic is truly hauntingly enticing. Jen – you are a very talented photographer. I wish you & Mike all the best for your life together. Darcie, for sure Peter would have loved the trip with u & Siobhan to Connecticut with all these great impressions nature offers at this time of the year & celebrating with his friends. The duality within Fall is heart breaking - a kaleidoscope of colors as a final sign of life before nature falls asleep for winter – everything dies. Thx for posting the clip - haven’t watched it yet - many songs on the WCD album are so personal - knowing how hard some personal issues are to handle I can imagine that it was quite of a challenge to perform these songs live. I mean I get teary eyes each time I hear Peter sing: ‘ I’m searching for something which can’t be found but I’m hoping‘ – I can relate to this feeling so much. ‚Suspended in Dusk‘ … even if the lyrics appear gothic and inspired by some vampire story it creates and/or catches the emotion (at least to me) of feeling like an alien (alone, misunderstood) at times – a feeling we all know, I guess ;-) but hearing songs like these really helps me to feel not so alone. Anyway another great song – especially around this time of the year. Thank you for sharing & taking your time, Darcie.
    Much love & respect

  10. This song, I choose to only ever play through headphones :D ...very deep, sad and evocative.
    Congratulations Jen and Mike. I loved the photography - stunning light, texture, juxtaposition... plus, great halloween humour, the cat's expression cracks me up :D
    Wish I could afford the snow-covered graveyard scene :(
    Thanks for sharing
    Love and Respect, as always <3

  11. Thank you Darcie and Siobhan for coming to my gothic halloween engagement party at Lockwood Mathews Mansion (the home of the Stepford Wives movies and the Dark Shadows movie)...as their photographer I have access to all 62 rooms in that hauntingly beautiful mansion. I know Peter would have loved it. I do a lot of cemetery photos and have had one kicking around that i wanted to do in memory of Peter but every time I tried, my emotions would get the best of me. I knew Peter since '94...that friendship remains private...but with a heavy heart I will say that a day doesn't go by that I don't think about him. He was very special to me. The morning I found out that he died, I had a dream about him that night. Never did I think he'd die...at least not the way he did. I hold Darcie close to my heart because...well, I won't get into it. Thank you to everyone that enjoyed my photos. He knew about my photos for years. I promise Darcie when I get around to make the one dedicated to him, you and the family will get one. And I think I will name it Suspended in Dusk. ;)
    Until we meet again someday, P., may you have finally found peace. xoxo